{"_id":"68a4ff262cc850e0af10365e","title":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"Do I need to forgive someone who mistreated or abused me in order for Allah to forgive me?\\n\"}]}","question":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"I saw a post here about how forgiveness is vital in Islam. What if a person has been subject to mistreatment from a grandparent - such as continuous sexual abuse at a very young age - and cannot bring themselves to forgive? We are taught to forgive and not forget, but in this case, there is no desire in my heart to forgive because they took advantage of me when I didn't know any better. You mentioned ayahs and ahadith about forgiveness and how one will not be forgiven unless they forgive others. Does that apply here? Allah is the Most Merciful and the Best Judge, and all will be held accountable on the Day of Judgement. Do I need to forgive this action in order to be forgiven and shown mercy?\\n\"}]}","answer":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"Your question touches on a deeply painful and sensitive reality, and I want to acknowledge the immense strength it takes to even express these thoughts. What you have endured is a grave injustice, and Islam does not demand that victims of such harm suppress their pain or force themselves to forgive when it feels impossible.\\n\\nForgiveness in Islam is highly encouraged, but it is not an obligation in cases of severe wrongdoing, especially when it involves oppression, abuse, or trauma. The ayat and ahadith about forgiveness emphasize letting go of personal grievances when it is within one's capacity and for one’s own healing, but they do not mean that a victim must forgive an abuser to attain Allah’s mercy. Rather, Allah’s justice is perfect, and He knows what is in your heart. Allah says:\\n\\n\"},{\"attributes\":{\"bold\":true},\"insert\":\"\\\"And those who, when tyranny strikes them, they defend themselves. And the recompense of an evil deed is an evil like it, but whoever pardons and makes reconciliation—his reward is [due] from Allah. Indeed, He does not like wrongdoers.\\\" \"},{\"attributes\":{\"link\":\"https://quran.com/42/39-40\",\"bold\":true},\"insert\":\"(Qur’an, 42:39-40)\"},{\"insert\":\"\\n\\nThis verse shows that forgiveness is a virtue, but defending oneself and seeking justice is entirely valid. Allah does not love oppression, nor does He command victims to absolve their oppressors if it causes them further pain.\\n\\nYou are not required to force yourself into forgiveness, nor does withholding it mean you will be deprived of Allah’s mercy. Your healing is your priority, and Allah, the Most Just, will hold oppressors accountable. What matters most is that you entrust your pain to Him, knowing that He sees all and will bring about justice in the best way.\\n\\nMay Allah grant you comfort, healing, and justice, and may He ease the burden of your heart in whatever way is best for you.\\n\"}]}","tags":[{"_id":"668d9fe20b76658b4c23280c","tag":"Relationships: Extended Family","count":47},{"_id":"668d9fee0b76658b4c232969","tag":"Forgiveness","count":4}],"createdOn":"2025-08-19T22:48:06.123Z"}