{"_id":"6851875a693008ba4491a069","title":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"What should I do when I can't bring myself to forgive someone for the way they treated me?\\n\"}]}","question":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"I was in a group of people working together for the community. There was one brother who seemed to be a good brother to everyone on the team whom I still cannot forgive until now. He interacted with all the sisters in the team just fine except me. That affected me deeply. Every time he treated me differently, I found myself wondering: what did I do wrong?\\n\\nI’m not a Muslim who holds ill feelings toward others, but I genuinely couldn’t bring myself to forgive him. Every time I was hurt by his behavior, I would ask Allah to deal with him. I didn’t understand the reason behind the way he treated me. Because of how he made me feel, I ended up not doing as much as I wanted to for the team. I held back, even though I had a sincere intention to serve the community.\\n\\nNow that I’m no longer working with them, and I know I will not see him again I still find myself holding onto this pain especially because, to this day, I don’t know what I did to deserve that treatment. What do you advise me to do in this situation?\\n\"}]}","answer":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"I understand how this kind of treatment can cause deep pain and lasting resentment. But perhaps you’ve been viewing the situation through the wrong lens all this time. Why assume that his behavior toward you was caused by something you did? It’s entirely possible, even likely, that it had nothing to do with you at all.\\n\\nPeople often treat others based on what they are going through, not on who you are. And in fact, if the issue had truly been something you did wrong, and this brother had even a basic level of decency, he would have pulled you aside and offered sincere advice. The fact that he treated you differently without explanation or care shows a shortcoming on his part, not yours.\\n\\nWith that in mind, I encourage you to clear your heart of resentment. Replace it with compassion. Ask Allah to forgive him and to help him overcome whatever shortcomings led to that behavior. Doing so won’t excuse what happened, but it will free you from continuing to carry the weight of someone else’s problem.\\n\"}]}","tags":[{"_id":"6771f804780db971903c8df1","tag":"Relationships: Other","count":35}],"createdOn":"2025-06-17T15:18:50.684Z"}