{"_id":"6834864924a33479909c66f7","title":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"Is it wrong to want to be closer to Allah than other people?\\n\"}]}","question":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"I find myself always wondering what my position with Allah is, and I feel envious if I feel Allah loves someone more than me. I don't mean that in a way where I wish anything bad for them or wish for them to not have a great relationship with Allah, but I feel a sense of jealousy that makes me want to be closer to Allah. Even walking into a room, I hope that I’m the closest to Allah. I know I’m not of course, but I always feel this urge to strive to be closer to him and it’s heightened when I feel others are far better than me in character and ibadah. Even with people who may openly sin I find myself thinking Allah loves them more because they probably perform many good deeds behind closed doors that I don’t. It’s a strange feeling because I never think I’m “better” or more righteous than anyone, but I wish to have a closer relationship with Allah than anyone around me even though I’m aware I’d never actually know that. Is it wrong of me to think this way?\\n\"}]}","answer":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"It’s completely natural to wonder where you stand with Allah. You’re not envious in the destructive sense. Rather, you’re expressing what the Prophet ﷺ called ghibṭa: a praiseworthy type of envy where you admire what someone else has and hope to have it too, without wanting it taken away from them. And when the thing you desire most is closeness to Allah, then this longing becomes a form of worship. The fact that your heart is stirred when you see people devoted in worship, or even when you imagine they might be doing good behind closed doors is a beautiful sign. It means you don’t want status; you want proximity. You don’t want recognition; you want nearness. And Allah knows the purity of your intention.\\n\\nYou also mentioned hoping, even quietly, to be the one closest to Allah in any room. That may feel bold or even strange to admit, but it’s a feeling rooted in ḥubb lillāh: a deep love for Allah and a desire for His love in return. There's nothing wrong with yearning to be beloved to Allah. That longing should drive you to ʿamal (action), taqwā (consciousness), and ikhlāṣ (sincerity).\\n\\nBut one small reminder: let your striving come from a place of love, not fear of being unloved. Allah’s love is vast and not confined. He can love you immensely and love others immensely too. His mercy and love aren’t pie slices to be divided. They are oceans without shore. Keep longing, keep loving, and keep striving. And whenever those thoughts visit you answer them with dua: \"},{\"attributes\":{\"italic\":true,\"bold\":true},\"insert\":\"“O Allah, make me among those You love. Draw me near, even when I fall short.”  \"},{\"insert\":\"That's a heart Allah never turns away.\\n\"}]}","tags":[{"_id":"668d9fe30b76658b4c232829","tag":"Worship: Dua","count":109},{"_id":"668d9ff20b76658b4c2329d9","tag":"Worship: Intention","count":103},{"_id":"668da0320b76658b4c2330a7","tag":"Worship: Tazkiyyah","count":87},{"_id":"668d9fe30b76658b4c232826","tag":"Worship: Etiquettes","count":79}],"createdOn":"2025-05-26T15:18:33.960Z"}