{"_id":"66fd7750928b902b953d7d38","title":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"How can one have respect and pray for an elder that has hurt others?\"}]}","question":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"I have always been taught to respect and pray for elders, especially one's parents/relatives. There is a member in my family whom I struggle to get along with due to their behavior. Recently, I learned more about some of their past behavior and actions. I already struggled heavily to make dua for this person (I just couldn't feel it coming from my heart but more so from a sense of obligation) & I just feel like after hearing all of this, I just don't know how to sit there and pray for their general well-being & forgiveness for them. Their actions and behavior are not just individual ones but ones that have harmed people and I don't know if these people have ever fully healed. I'm just unsure of how to navigate my feelings toward this elder while also thinking about what is Islamically right.\"}]}","answer":"{\"ops\":[{\"insert\":\"Islam does not condone harmful behavior, regardless of who it comes from. While we are encouraged to respect and pray for others, including our elders, this does not mean overlooking or excusing their wrong actions. If this family member has hurt others, it’s completely understandable to feel conflicted. You can still pray for their guidance and ask Allah to help them rectify their wrongs, while also praying for those they have harmed, asking Allah to grant them healing and justice.\\n\\nIt can be difficult to separate your feelings about this person, but seeking Allah’s help in bringing about both healing and justice can provide emotional relief. Respect for elders does not mean tolerating or enabling harmful behavior. If interacting with this person is challenging, you are within your rights to set healthy boundaries. Respect doesn’t require you to subject yourself to harm or injustice.\\n\\nUltimately, what is Islamically right involves balancing the maintenance of family ties with standing against wrongdoing. You are not required to love every action of a family member or feel warmth toward them if they have caused harm.\"}]}","tags":[{"_id":"668d9fe30b76658b4c232829","tag":"Worship: Dua","count":109},{"_id":"668d9fe20b76658b4c23280c","tag":"Relationships: Extended Family","count":47}],"createdOn":"2024-10-02T16:39:44.653Z"}